Not Quite Set

before I do any serious posts…The best ad ever…

I have a few Fathers.  Several amazing men in my life.  I’m lucky that way.  The more the merrier I say.  But then again I think I have a pretty good definition of the word.  A Father to me is a man that makes an impact, a positive one.  A man that makes you proud to call him Dad.  You can be born to them, you can marry into them, you can have them brought into your life by other people that mean a lot to you.

These are the men that chase after you down the water slide when you slip out of their arms and are afraid to hit the pool on your own; the guys that pad up the back of the van and fill it with movies so that the long drive is easy.  They are the ones that toss you and your Mom into the tiny back yard swimming pool clothes and all when its too hot to smile, and stay up late with you on Christmas eve laughing with you at the Popes hat.   The men that welcome you with open arms when you’ve never met them before and have no idea what you are really doing on this farm.  And the ones that treat you like one of their “real daughters” from the day they meet you. All the men that when they hug you you feel safe and loved.

Fathers are the amazing men that try to do everything they can to help when you are overwhelmed with new baby and life and everything in between.  They take over when you can’t do it anymore.  They know what a big deal it is to let you sleep late and still call you gorgeous.  They love the one on one times they have with their children.

You don’t always appreciate them, you don’t always pay enough attention, you don’t always thank them enough, but still they are there.

If you have one Father in your life you are lucky, if you have many you are lucky.  I love all of mine, and thank them for all that they have given to me.

Happy Fathers Day.

Elijah has been very content lately to sit and look at his books.  He lifts the flaps, turns the color wheels, flips the pages.  It gives me some quiet.  Actually it gives ma a lot of quiet.  He’ll play like that for quite some time.  He doesnt have the same attention span for his other toys.  This of course pleases me greatly and leaves me wondering…

As a first time Mom I think to myself, am I interacting enough?  When we go on walks I name everything he points at, we read every night, we stack things on occasion, we play peek and chase.  I let him go up the stairs and patiently keep a step back just in case.  But I read the magazines and the blogs and I realize, I don’t play pat-a-cake with him often.  We don’t sing the ABC’s, I prefer to have music on that isn’t toddler themed.  We hang out at the coffee shop and stop to talk to dogs.  I guess my worry is that I don’t do the “typical” baby stuff you see.  Am I stunting him in some way?  Does it matter at this age?  Should we be doing the itsy bitsy spider more often, should he already know how to clap?

So my Mom skills are under investigation right now…but at the same time, when my head is full of other life, and he seems so happy playing with books, could it just mean I’m raising a reader.  A fearless and active when he wants quiet boy?  When he goes to school he’ll be behind on the games…but he will probably know exactly what to do during quiet time…

Some of my favorite things are happy accidents…it’s a term my ceramics teacher used a lot…I guess he knew I never really had a plan…

I’d love to say that I took this picture.  I didn’t.  Sherman took it, and for some reason I just love it.  I think the softness, the color, the warmth, is beautiful.  He admitted to it being a “whoops”.  He told me he was trying to suprise me with a…well a different picture…to set as my phone wallpaper when I walked in with Ijah…

I imagine I’ll get the intended one as well.    I do like the accident though.

I don’t walk under ladders, I throw salt, I say bless you…no way I’m letting my total posts sit at 666 for long…

I saw a website once about these crafty new graffiti artists that instead on paint used string, yarn, or other textiles… knitting cozies for fire hydrants, wrapping lightposts in yarn, that sort of thing.  Honestly I love it.  I think graffiti, when not insanely distructive or hateful is a beautiful thing.  It seems though as if these “string artists” have made it to the twin cities…hell…maybe they were here the whole time and I just opened my eyes.

But anyway, I’ve been noticing small things, large things, chain link fences with HOT or HOTTER written in string.  They make me smile.  I found this the other day and really loved it though.  It made me want to find my inner vandal and take up crocheting again.  There are some hydrants around here that could using sprucing up.

I want a do-over of the morning…one where I take up Shermans super sweet letting me sleep in offer…where I wake up when he needs to get ready and Ijah is not in a crabby, screechy mood.

There are times when I am 100% sure that I can not do this, that I can’t take one more day of clingy, un-happy, tired, not napping baby.

Then he naps, and we walk, and he’s sweet to his Dad, and dances to songs he likes, and things are good.

I’m just hoping today is hump-day for real…because my Mom skills are waning…and my head is getting full and tired.

I know the kiddo being sick is hard for him…but I’m pretty sure its as hard for me…

It is fun to see him dance though, and make him laugh when I can, and see him climb up his Dads leg…just wish he wasn’t so crabby this week…

were playing on my computer

It sucks…it sucks what can happen to your body.  It sucks when you can’t catch a break.  When a medication that is try to fix “A” screws up “B” and points you to “C” which is falling apart too.  It sucks that things get to the point that they can’t be repaired, and just keep on hurting themselves.  It sucks that a man who is not old has to deal with his body not wanting to work any more.

It sucks that I don’t have a magic wand.  A way to magic a cure, a way home, the money to help out.

It sucks when you can’t help.

It sucks that time rushes by and you can’t stop it or slow it down.  You can only try to enjoy it and do your best.

My Dad (Mark/Step-dad) is in the hospital again.  The things they knew about are getting worse and new things are popping up.  It sucks…

When are they going to come up with that replacement body solution…